An experimental poem in terms of the form: a mix between an ad and a poem on society.
Before you enjoy your fresh cup of McDonald’s coffee, take note of the warnings on the lid and along the seam of the disposable cup. We serve our delicious coffee at 180o
F, so that your joe on the go stays hotter, longer.
Since the Liebeck lawsuit and other related lawsuits, however, we have been forced to add instructional warnings on the cup.
They are as follows:
Keep cup secure in cup holder when inside a vehicle.
Only qualified personnel may fill cup, or add cream and/or sugar upon request.
Qualified personnel must be sure that lid is firmly secure on cup.
Do not microwave liquid in disposable cup.
Do not drink until liquid is lukewarm.
Do not drink and drive.
Do not drink.
We know you’re an idiot.
We know you’ll ignore these new warning labels
anyway. No one reads anymore.
We know you’ll be sitting in your car, your coffee
cup between your legs because there are no cup holders, the
lid mostly open, and rather than
adding your cream and sugar,
hot coffee gets all over your lap and singes your groin.
What else did you expect?
We know idiots like you will inherit the earth.
Your new cup is our company’s contribution
to idiot-proof the world. We should
enjoy our first-world pleasures safely
by not enjoying them at all.
Sharing this here considering this is a poetry blog. Originally posted on my personal blog. Great poem read by a great yet strange actor.
Found this on my Facebook feed and I had to share it here!
I’ll admit, Poe’s one of my favorite writers; I’ve always enjoyed any of his poems/stories that I read for my English classes in high school and college. Sometime, probably when I’m done slugging through college, I would love to get a complete collection of all his works (if such a thing exists).
Oh yeah, it’s read by none other than Christopher Walken, complimented by background ambiance!
I recently created a separate writing account on Twitter. If you want, give it a follow
If you haven’t done so already, please see the “About” page to know the dirty details behind this blog.
Basically, I want to have a blog for my poems, and I have no intention of trying to build a readership or anything; this whole thing is, essentially, for my own sake. However, as you may have guessed, I’m willing to share my work with others. Of course, with it being poetry, this comes with the danger of things getting too personal or too revealing. I’m honestly OK with this; I don’t like the feeling that I have something to hide.
You may comment or give criticism on my work if you wish, even if you think it’s bad in some way, you may simply give it a “like” or “reblog,” or you may simply read it for what it is. Do what you wish.
First poem will be posted whenever. Thanks for reading!